jarhead.

at this point, i don't even know what to do with myself. seeing charred bodies and oil-covered marines desparate to get their kill in...

dave (man i love) will be back on leave in a few weeks for a glorious 15 day period. after seven months, these last few days are excruciatingly slow to wait through.

and i am officially graduated with a B.A. in Communication Arts. i got the paper in the mail and everything. took 5 1/2 years, but i'm finally done. and ready to have a drink or two with rudd/tammie/ann-who-doesn't-drink lawson.

there is a possibility of a get together in the canfield area on february 11th. i'd really like for dave to meet more of my friends. nothing is set in stone yet, so i'll keep you posted.

and it's the new year? where did 2005 even go? it seems like i was just in pittsburgh, watching elvis impersonations and singing kareoke (sp?). though it was great to spend time with malone friends this year in columbus, especially kristin and niffer.

right now, the next step is to find a job back in the burgh. i want to be back and settled in by june 1, 2006. now, i can make all the plans i want, but i'm not the editor. we'll see what He has in store.

more and more aware of my over-analyzation as a detriment, and when it's a detriment instead of a gift or blessing. i think the more i realize this, the more i can keep this in check, the less over-dramatic i will be in my reactions to people, to things. the more i will take responsibility for, and keep growing (up).

i don't feel i have much to contribute right now. just mundane updates, but no real insights.

ready to start living again. to regain my discipline. to stop making so many excuses. ready to shut my mouth and listen. really listen. ready to lose myself to find myself again. in the meantime, i may be a little bit quiet............

(but i'll keep using elipses).

.......................